We’ve been arguing over money since I reduced my hours at work to start a family. When this happened my husband had agreed we would need to merge finances. This hasn’t happened and I’m about to go on Mat leave with earnings dropping down to about 600 a month for 9 months and zero for three months. My direct debits come to about £350. I currently pay for all my daughters clothes swimming lessons etc my clothes toys our food bills petrol some furniture on direct debits. We live in the country so petrol bills are high. My journey to work is about 18 miles each way supermarket 10 miles. I can’t see how I’ll manage. Husband won’t entertain a joint account but after 6 months of arguing has finally transferred a monthly allowance for the food bill to my account. All bills mortgage savings are in his name he pays for nursery fees so he is not refusing to pay fir things but before I met him I was financially independent had my name on all the bills paid my own way and since we married he’s just carried on as if he’s single not involving me in any money decisions. When we married he wanted a prenup but was talked out of it when the solicitor said it would be void if I had his children as I’d be entitled to half not what he wished to suggest in the agreement if things went wrong. We constantly argue about money as when mine runs out I have to ask and I feel like he’s my dad not my husband I told him could I have petrol money as was overdrawn and he said I’d have to meet him at the petrol station for him to pay. I still have a credit card from my last mat leave that I can’t really afford to pay off because when my pay went to zero (which he fully agreed I could take unpaid leave and he’d support me) he said I had to use my credit card to live off as we had other expenses. Does anyone have any advice? I’m starting to resent him because I’m not involved in any of our finances he just thinks I should live off what I earn and be grateful he pays the mortgage. Fir comparison his salary is 5x mine and our mortgage is relatively small. I’ve been contemplating going back to work full time so I have more money but I have a long term health condition so Woking three days suits me now I have a family to care for too

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